2 Ways to Stop Mom Stress from Stealing Your Joy
While it isn’t new for moms to feel stressed, today’s social-media-soaked world makes fighting it harder. Let’s face it: feeding the “I’m not good enough” fear is as easy as scrolling through your favorite social media app. We all know most social media content is staged, filtered, and cropped to perfection, yet we all believe it’s real life. We often judge our lives as not good enough when we see perfection on the screen. These negative thoughts create distress, and nobody wants more of it.
Here are two ways you can decrease your stress.
Tech-Free Routines
Children thrive on predictable routines. They quickly learn when it’s time to eat, bathe, and sleep. While some fussing is expected, your daily I-think-I’m-going-crazy level will diminish when you establish a predictable schedule and do less chasing after what your child wants.
For example, while your baby may want the phone or tablet, you should fight the urge to use technology to get through meals, run errands, and stop temper tantrums. Previous generations of mothers sang songs, played calm background music (no video), or allowed silence to rule. These methods worked then and work now.
Science shows many of today’s children are anxious and overstimulated due to too much sound, flashing lights, and moving images. They cry, fuss, and act out because “it’s all too much.” Yet, they want more, even when it’s unhealthy because they become addicted.
Don’t be afraid to “be the mom.” Take control and establish calm, predictable routines. Less technology during daily activities means fewer times you have to turn it off or take it away. And we all know what happens when you have to say no. The wiser path is to limit technology in the first place.
Set Realistic Goals
Most moms try to do it all. And the culture tells us we should have it all. These beliefs are a relatively new phenomenon and are unrealistic and unhealthy.
My stress decreased in those sleep-deprived diaper days when I put my career in the back seat and reduced my hours from full-time to part-time. Maybe you can cut back on some of your obligations so you feel better. If you don’t care for yourself, you’ll be too tired or distracted to be fully present with your child. Maybe mop the kitchen once daily instead of after every meal or nap while your baby naps. You can make adjustments if you decide you must.
In Ecclesiastes 3, King Solomon shared the ancient wisdom that there is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens. In other words, your career may be on hold during this season while your kids are young, or you can’t be president of the neighborhood association. Those decisions are okay because it’s only a season.
If you don’t want to take King Solomon’s advice, feminist Betty Friedan said, “You can have it all, just not all at the same time.” Following wise counsel over the whims of social media influencers will give you peace of mind and less distress. Share on X You are not missing out on anything of value when you focus solely on being a great mom. Because there is nothing more valuable than being the best mother you can be. The success of society rests on the shoulders of great mothers, so embrace the value of the vital role of motherhood.
Final Take-Away
Mothering has never been easy. And probably never will. But if you continue to chase the ebbs and flows of the culture, you’ll lose your joy. You’ll be happier if you decide to:
- Stop relying on technology to transition from one activity to another or to stop temper tantrums. Your child will learn to calm themselves and gain greater emotional maturity if you don’t use the crutch of technology.
- Follow ancient wisdom, not the ebbs and flows of society. All mothers must balance competing needs and obligations. Learning to say no to some things trains you to value your time. And your time is valuable because you’re doing the most vital job in the world.
What are some ways you’ve found to increase your joy?
(Photo: Canva)
Disclaimer: All information presented is general education and is not intended as specific prescriptions for your child. If you have concerns about any aspect of your baby’s development, talk with your doctor. If your child receives any intervention or therapy, this information is not intended to be used without their knowledge.
